GG Allin Cancelled 862 Times In 4-Minute Span.
--Stanford Gazette--
Legendary punk rocker Mr GG Allin, long believed to have died, made somewhat of a surprise appearance at the Stanford University campus to kick off his nationwide campus tour entitled "Cancel My Crippled Cock You Fucking Sissy Cunt Faggetz".
However, the legendary punk rockers nationwide campus tour was cut short after just 4 minutes when he was cancelled no less than 862 times within the space of just 4 minutes on stage, shattering the national record previously held by Louis CK who registered a mere 12 cancellations.
A selection of the songs Mr Allin managed to play in the 4 minutes before he was taken into cancellation custody are as follows:
"Eat my fukk u shart booger cuntwraps." (0.30)
"Gay snot anal AIDS superhighway this, woke cunts". (0.19)
"Belsen up my ballsack u gestapo faggettz". (0.22)
"Jack off my Zyklon HIV fuel rod all u lez slut cum silos". (0.28)
"WokeFuck Hookerz4Life VS WokeFuck Ho's4Deth". (0.12)
"Crippled Cock Open Casket Blues (my 1st ever ballad)". (0.17)
"Leper Nazi Cock My HIV Radiation Ballmeat U Fukkz". (0.24)
"The Ball Gag Donkey Punch Blues (my 2nd ever ballad)". (0.31)
"Safe Space My Gestapo Cock and Balls U Hippie Faggett Cuntz". (0.14)
Stanford University student body representative and Feminist Studies major Madison Vaggarden was less than impressed.
"The entire assembled student faculty were in tears".
--Madison Vaggarden.
"Some students were visibly shaking and none of them will ever, ever recover from this extremely distressing afternoon" continued the distraught Ms Vaggarden. "I literally cannot believe that given the hostile reception Mr Allin received in those 4 minutes inside our cocooned campus safe space, he thought it would be a good idea to come out and perform an encore entitled "Anal Cunt My Tranny HIV Love Piston". I literally cannot believe there is a song in existence with such a highly, highly offensive title. My world is in pieces. I need to go back to my dorm room immediately and play my Enya CD and have a soy kale spinach latte to calm myself down".
