Wayne Gunston's Guide to $20 Words.
Gidday, tatterdemalion cunts!
Welcome to Wayne Gunston's Guide to $20 Words.
Me, Wayne, your favourite
lalochezian callipygous bastard.
I know all the $20 words. I bought
the whole fucken lot for 50 bucks
at that garage sale on the weekend.
Now then, let's get down to business. How many $20 words do you know cunt? Four? Sorry smartarse, but "supercilious" is no longer a $20 word. It's a $5 word at best. So now you only know three $20 words. Callipygous and two others.
Pathetic.
You thick bastard.
There's only so many times you, the online cunt, can drop "mellifluous", "callipygous" and that one other flash harry word into your stunted, shithouse prose before the ruse is well and truly up.
That's where I come in. Once your cheque's cleared, my Wayne Gunston's Guide to $20 Words will show you exactly where and when to use $20 words.
$695.99 for just 12 easy-to-follow instalments.
No layby. Stop fucking around and PAY NOW.
Here is just a brief sampler of what you can expect from Wayne Gunston's Guide to $20 Words.
* A refresher course on the $20 words you already know. Face it, you've already forgotten what "callipygous" means and you only found out about the fucken stupid thing 3 bloody sentences ago. Stupid bastard. PAY NOW!
* An autographed strand of my lustrous hair. Use it as a bookmark. It's that bloody thick!
* Words.
* Sexually graphic passages.
* Pictures of $20 words.
Gunston InfoMercial
Do you even know the meanings of words?
DO YOU?
Let's look at the meanings of some words and find out the history of where the meanings of the words came from:
/ˈmastəbeɪtə/
"Mastur" is the Slavic word for "Master".
"Bator" is the Greek word for "baton".
In its most figurative sense, to masturbate is to master the baton.
/ˈfɔːrəm/
"Forum" is the singular form of the greek term "Forii Generalis". This was originally a foyer of general forus interaction which was first discovered by the Greeks in Ancient Rome in early 1994.
/ˈdʒɛn(ə)r(ə)l/
The word "General" can be traced to the 3rd century Greek leader "Genus Generalis", a mighty historical figure who led his battalion in the Battle of Alpaca in 36BC.
Not only will my Guide to $20 Words educate you about ALL the $20 words it will also "troubleshoot" those words that are often mistaken for being $20 words but are in fact NOT $20 words.
Here is a brief sample list of just some of the commonly mistaken $20 words as exposed by Wayne Gunston's Guide to $20 Words.
* Wheelbarrow (quite a long word, hence the confusion. NOT a $20 word)
* Elephant (elephants are big which makes people think the word "elephant" is a big, long, confusing word but at a paltry 7 letters elephant is not an overly long word)
* Psychedelic (nothing about a hippie is worth $20 bucks)
Pay NOW to get the full list of NOT $20 words!
Just $850.99 in 8 easy instalments.
Operators are standing by!
"Thank you for shopping with Gunston and Gunston, thank you, next please, thank you bye bye now, thank you, look cunt would you please get off the fucken line I'm trying to look busy here, next please thank you bye bye now."
That's it then, we're all done here, by stupidly clicking on that paypal logo above you've triggered an automatic payment, thanks for shopping with Gunston & Gunston, my fuckwit brother Wayne is coming over to your place right now in his ute to deliver your stupid fuckhead book.
"Jesus, I wouldn't pay shit for this."
Righto.
--Wayne.
