--Japan Times--
Prince Akishino of Japan has today gifted a random tree in a local park to his son. "To you boy, I gift this tree" said the Prince. "It has special emotional significance for me. Because when your mother and I were 4 years old we were once hiding up that tree together. And it sticks in my mind that it was the first time that she ever put her fist right up my fucken clacka. When we were sitting up in that tree together."
"I lost my anal virginity up that very same tree".
--The Prince
"Bear in mind though, boy... upskirt photography is hopeless when you are sitting up in this tree. The angles are all wrong."
"Fun fact, kids; I actually edited the Latin name for this tree species on wikipedia to 'Annus Clackoralis Fistibum'".
