Friday, August 14, 2020

Anton’s Restaurant Capitalises On Climate Crisis

–AP Press–

World-renowned restaurant “Anton’s” have announced they are going to pounce on the climate change catastrophe as a “business opportunity” and proceed to procure animals from the rapidly-thawing arctic circle for their kitchen as these endangered animals no longer have a surplus of snow and ice in which to hide.


“We’ll find you, you fat freezing fucking little shitheads.”
–Anton.
https://antonsrestaurant.wixsite.com/animals

The Michelin 5-star eatery has long been at the forefont of cutting-edge cuisine with an international menu boasting exotic delicacies such as Flambed Vietnamese Goat Cock Kebab and Exploded Welsh Porcupine Nutsack Soup.

“Are you fucken laughing at me cunt? Or is that a frozen cry for help? Either way, #seal_stew.”




“You can’t just sit out there forever you fat useless blimp. So just swim the fuck over here and get in the fucking pot.”




“I don’t even know what the hell you are, fuzzy little wanker, who cares, in the fucken pot you go.”

Related Articles: https://antonsrestaurant.wixsite.com/animals

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