"Gidday Bluehost, dipshit Dawlo here forgot the password and email he used to register his last fuckhead blog with, please send us a password reset, thanks mate."
"Hello and Welcome to Bluetooth, Bluehost, Paypal and Bezos.Inc. How can I help you today, Sir?"
"Password reset please."
"Thank you Sir. Please pop in to our Geneva branch with government issue ID retinal scans run in triplicate through James Bond's fucken one-eye. Can I assist you with anything else today Sir?"
"What the f....."
"Sorry Sir we can no longer assist you until you provide the required documentation, have a nice day Sir, Sir is there anything else we can assist you with today?"
"Are you on drugs? Shit-for-brains Dawlo just wants
a password reset for his fuckhead blog please, thank you"
"Sorry Sir we can no longer assist you until you provide the required documentation, have a nice day Sir, Sir is there anything else we can assist you with today?"
"Sorry Sir we can no longer assist you until you provide the required documentation, have a nice day Sir, Sir is there anything else we can assist you with today?"
"P-A-S-S-W-O-D-R-D."
"Thank you Sir, and may the spirit of passover be with you too."
"Look, you've got colour copies of Dawlo's government issued ID, black and white copies of his government issued ID, his name, his address, all his phone numbers, retinal scans of James Brown's bumcrack, his credit card number, James Bond's credit card number as well as THE MONEY FUCKBRAINS DAWLEY PAID YOU FOR A STUPID LITTLE WEB BLOG SO PLEASE can you just FUCKING PLEASE RESET THE FUCKING PASSWORD TO HIS STUPID LITTLE POINTLESS WEB BLOG PLEASE THANK YOU".
"Hello and Welcome to Bluehost.Bluetooth.Bezos.Paypaypal.Cunt.Inc. How can I help you today, Sir?"
"Password reset please."
"Sir, your web blog homepage has been **SUSPENDED**. Feel free to obtain a Supreme Court Justice Court Order from James Bond's bumcrack and we'll happily unlock your domain for you. You have a nice day now, Sir. Can I assist you with anything else today Sir?"
"Soooooo just to clarify, we've paid you Bluehost.Bezos.Big.Business cunts $100 FOR A STUPID LITTLE WEB BLOG THAT YOUVE NOW FUCKING SUSPENDED JUST BECAUSE DOGBRAIN DAWLO FORGOT HIS FUCKEN PASSWORD?"
"It's quite saddening to hear about your experience. Please consult with Bluehost Tech Support, they'll be only too happy to assist, thank you, have a nice day, Sir"
"You ARE tech support. That's why we called you".
"Sorry Sir we can no longer assist you until you provide the required documentation, have a nice day Sir, Sir is there anything else we can assist you with today?"
"P-A-S-S-S-S-S-W-O-D-R-D-D-D."
"Thank you Sir, and may the spirit of passover be with you too."
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