Japan LDP Stonemasons Bukkake Summit: cc/Ministers RSVP.

Hello, Ministers. Yuko Tojo here. I am the granddaughter of Dr General Tojo. Yes, your great compatriot, statesman, fallen leader and national hero, the immortal, the great, Dr General Tojo. R.I.P.

My niggers and assorted motherfuckers, if you are reading this, then it is ALL FUCKING ON.

Yes, it’s that time of the year again, time for The Liberal Democratic Party Stonemason’s Bukkake Summit.

I will be working the door this year. And this year’s edition promises to be the best one ever! Maybe even better than the legendary 2013 Summit! Check out the picture below of me holding the Bukkake Summit Shield. You can also see behind me some pictures of my total fucken stud grandfather. R.I.P.

Back to the legendary 2013 Bukkake Summit, who could forget the timeless spectacle of the entire cabinet emerging from 3 days of hectic cum depositing all over some wretched little vagrant slut.. and every one of the ministers emerging wearing hastily-procured trousers due to the massive fire hose deluge of sperm stainage blotched all over their best strides? WHO?

“Don’t worry, no fuckers will notice…”

Anyway, here is the Official List of this years invitees and if you’re not on this list then holy shit motherfucker, you should not even be reading this.

Shinzo Abe. Prime Minister.

Doing great work for the nation. He is now so very, very close to altering the pathetic limpdick National Constitution that forbids We Japanese from bearing arms.

Any day now we can FINALLY resume the push through Manchuria and beyond, to claim back our rightful motherfucking colonies from the cross-eyed gookisphere.




Taro Aso. Minister of Grot Mags and Entire Grot Portfolio.

Taro might not know how to read or write but he knows how to man the pump. The Man Pump! NATIONAL TREASURE.





Koizumi. ex-PM.

Legendary shot above of Koizumi leaving the 2008 Summit wearing a change of pants after his main suit strides were irrepairably stained with what was believed to be in excess of 75 litres of cum silo spermage.
Koizumi is old as shit now but I reckon there’s still some tartare dicksnot left in the old faucet!





Kono. Minister of ?

Who is this shady prick? I’m fucked if I know. Still, he must be doing something right if he’s on this list. Come on down Kono, Minister of fuck-knows-what, and enjoy 3 days of leisurely beating off all over some starlet’s tits on the taxpayers dime.







Noda. Minister of Tea and Photocopies.

HOLY SHIT. It’s this years chick. Even I’m getting randy. THIS IS GOING TO BE AWESOME. WE MIGHT HAVE TO ADD A 4TH DAY. Wheel in the Jacques Cousteau Iron Lung goddamnit cos this bitch is going to need it.




Ishihara. Minister of Nationalism.

The Governor. He brought the Olympics to Tokyo and let me tell you, next weekend there is going to be some Olympian wanking going on all over the tea lady’s hair, her teeth, her funbags, face, eyelids, gruds and neck. A decathlon of dick. A repecharge of rape. A velodrome of vag. A peloton of prepuce. A pentathlon of penii. A snatch and jerk of, uh, snatch and jerk.










Nuremberg Barbie. Special Guest!

Don’t worry, the special guest will of course NOT be permitted entrance into the main Bukkake Amphitheatre. Only one chick at a time in the Theatre of Dreams, obviously. We don’t want two childish little slags getting together and forming a fucken trade union or some shit.

Nuremberg Barbie will be working the main lobby. Stiffy killer you say? Did I neglect to mention that she will be decked out in FULL Nazi regalia? Tojo todgers at full-mast baby!







Bruce Saint. Australian Envoy in Tokyo.

No little kids there? Yeah, that’s a pass.”

Ozawa. Minister of Financial Improprieties.

The dark horse. The shadow boss. The Kumstain Kingpin. He’s been running the country since before Nuremburg Barbie was gargling candied cocks down by the docks after dark on school nights.






General Tojo’s mummified corpse.

My grandfather.
OH FAHHK.
The load-shooting is going to be epic.
I hope gramps casket came with a mummified brolly cos’ it’s going to be raining spunk!











Nakasone. Ex-Prime Minister.

Now aged 100. Holy shit. Might have to wheel in Nuremberg Barbie for this one.



Anywho, that’s the whole list of invitees.

No need to bring a plate.

Just cock.


-Yuko Tojo.