Japan’s Minister for Pre-Teen Grot Mags Lost in Daze.

 –Japan Today–

During a press conference today to discuss November shipments of Japan’s all-important pre-teen grot mags, Japan’s Minister for Pre-Teen Grot mags appeared to be lost in some sort of a glazed-eye kiddie rooting reverie.

”Minister, did you have a giant tug over the September issue yet? Minister?

As holder of the most important parliamentary post in the land, presiding over the cultural and financial backbone of the entire Japanese economy, and thus placed in a position of intense public scrutiny on a daily basis, the Minister has at times allowed himself to wander away into what could only be classed as a daydreaming tog-touching trance.

“Minister are you in fact playing pocket pool right now with your left hand as you think about November’s shipment of pre-teen grot mags? Minister? MINISTER! ANSWER ME YOU DOPEY CROSS-EYED WANKER.”

The Minister is under intense public pressure due to the very nature of his job. 94 million subscribers to the popular monthly “Sprogs in Togs” will do that. The last time a monthly shipment ran late by just 14 seconds, almost immediately an estimated 87,000 Japanese pedo’s hurled themselves in front of oncoming trains to end the anguish of being deprived for even one second of telephoto-lensed seaside pics of some sprog building a sandcastle in their gruds.

“Minister, will there be a Sprogs in Togs seaside centerfold this December? Minister? WILL THERE? ANSWER ME, MINISTER.”