Local Pilots Confused Over Seating Arrangements

 –Abu Dhabi Times—

Two local pilots are reportedly confused over the rejigged seating arrangements aboard their bosses opulently refurbished 747 Jumbo Jet. The aircraft now has only one seat on the whole plane. None in the cockpit. None in the restroom.

“Um… are you going to ask him why there’s no chairs in the cockpit?”
“Fuck no, you ask him.”

“Fools!” exclaimed the boss. “You may turn these two solid-gold trash receptacles here upside down and use them as makeshift stools for the duration of the journey. But do not shit in them. Only I may shit in them.”
“But Sir, to fly the plane we really need to…”
“STOOLS!”