Royal baby to be put up for adoption

–The Times–

Prince William has today announced that his brother Prince Harry’s newborn son is to be put up for adoption.

“The shitfaced little wanker is simply too ugly to keep in our royal fucken family” said a clearly incensed Prince William. “He’s scaring me. He’s got no teeth. I fucking hate him. We all do.”

“Jesus, I’ve had better-looking curry shits than that.”
-A clearly fucked-off Prince William leaving Harry’s house at No.10 Buckingham Palace with the horribly failed infant.

“I knew my ginger cunt brother was adopted but this is fucking ridiculous.”

“I might put the little ogre up for sale on the Deep Web” ruminated the future King of England. “Maybe 400 quid? Seems like a fair price for the satanic little malformed grotesquerie. Fucking adopted Harry. He must have pierced Meghan’s shrek gene with his love prod. Oh well. He’ll get over it.”