--USA Today--
Following the announcement of Bill and Melinda Gates divorce today, fellow billionaire Jeff Bezos has immediately started a prolific sexting campaign aimed at billionaire divorcee Melinda Gates.
"I can do a 1-day delivery of my cock up your arse" was just one of Bezos' many sexts.
"We can make a beautiful power couple, baby. Let's get back at Bill by flaunting our combined wealth. I can even hook you up with an Amazon Prime account at a very generous discount" was another.
Mrs Gates is said to be gagging for a root after years of failing to find Billy's microscopic stiffy.
"I might reply to Bezos with a gash pic, undecided yet. Old coot Billy here ain't exactly got a billion dollar stiffy any more, if you know what I'm saying. Before I entertain randy Jeff's power-hungry advances though, I fully intend to use my half of the Gates Foundation cash to criss-cross Africa getting my gash plowed by all sorts of massive African village dongers. I want to try out all the different shapes and sizes. It's gonna be great. I'm really looking forward to getting plowed up the shitter by 10 rock-hard inches of black mambo python for a year or two thank you, no more questions".
"Can I at least watch?"
"Never mind, I'll find you, then I'll watch anyway".
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